Two Bucks, One Sleepin' Bag

Two gruff hunting buddies book a heart-shaped-hot-tub cabin every season, zip into one sleeping bag "for the heat," and haven't shot a deer in three years. Down at the V-F-W, their wives have started a support group.

[Intro]

Y'all, this here's a huntin' song.

[Verse 1]

Me and Dale go huntin' every season, man to man Booked a cabin with a heart-shaped hot tub, that's the plan One king bed, a mirror on the ceilin' there I said, "Perfect, now I'll see it if there's a bear" Lit a candle, poured the wine to cover up our scent Brother, that's just huntin'. That's all it meant.

[Chorus]

Two bucks, one sleepin' bag Zipped up to the chin, cheek to cheek It's twenty below, so scoot on back That ain't my flashlight, Dale... don't speak Two bucks, one sleepin' bag (It's for the heat! It's for the heat!)

[Verse 2]

Fire died at midnight, Dale said, "Rule number one: Strip down to your boxers, skin on skin until the sun" Big spoon, little spoon, we swap it nightly, that's fair Dale hums a lullaby to keep away the bears Ain't shot a deer in three years, ain't even loaded up Best damn huntin' season. Dale, pour another cup.

[Chorus]

Two bucks, one sleepin' bag Zipped up to the chin, cheek to cheek It's twenty below, so scoot on back That ain't my flashlight, Dale... don't speak Two bucks, one sleepin' bag (It's for the heat! It's for the heat!)

[Bridge]

Tuesday at the V-F-W, the wives pull up a chair "Hi, I'm Linda. Mine came home with somebody else's hair" "I'm Brenda, Dale's wife." (Hi, Brenda.) "They got that sleepin' bag monogrammed. Both their names."

[Final Chorus]

Two bucks, one sleepin' bag Zipped up to the chin, cheek to cheek It's twenty below, so scoot on back That ain't my flashlight, Dale... don't speak Two bucks, one sleepin' bag (It's for the heat! It's for the heat!)

[Outro]

Dale... eh, leave it. It's warm.