Burn My Toast

His only turn-on is a scorched slice of rye, and he will explain this to every woman in the dive bar while the band beats each other up on stage.

[Intro]

(Spoken) Dave, quit chokin' the drummer! One, two, three, four!

[Verse 1]

Dive bar floor like flypaper glue, The singer just bit the drummer's shoe, I slide on up to a girl named Jen, "Can I tell you 'bout my problem again?" Lace does nothin', candles? No. Whipped cream leaves me hangin' low, But scorch a slice till it's charcoal black, And the tent goes up, there's no turnin' back!

[Chorus]

Burn my toast! (Burn my toast!) Crank it to ten and let it smoke! The smoke alarm's my mating call, Burnt rye, baby, I'm standin' tall! Burn my toast! (Burn my toast!) I only rise when the kitchen chokes!

[Verse 2]

Singer swings his mic stand at Chase, Drummer spits in the guitarist's face, Girl number nine just tossed her drink, So I plugged my toaster in by the sink! Sprinklers rainin' on the whole damn crowd, And I'm standin' at attention, proud!

[Chorus]

Burn my toast! (Burn my toast!) Crank it to ten and let it smoke! The smoke alarm's my mating call, Burnt rye, baby, I'm standin' tall! Burn my toast! (Burn my toast!) I only rise when the kitchen chokes!

[Instrumental Break]

[instrumental]

[Bridge]

Bouncer tossed me out on the curb, Covered in crumbs, a little disturbed, Then a lady fire marshal shows, She smells like a house fire... and it rose! (Spoken) Ma'am... can I tell you about my problem?

[Final Chorus]

Burn my toast! (Burn my toast!) Crank it to ten and let it smoke! The smoke alarm's my mating call, Burnt rye, baby, I'm standin' tall! Burn my toast! (Burn my toast!) I only rise when the kitchen chokes! (Whoa-oh! Whoa-oh!)

[Outro]

(Spoken) She wrote me a ticket. Best date of my life.